Episode 36- The 4 C's of Success

Commitment is one of the 3 C’s I share on this week’ podcast where I break down the 3 C’s of Success as described by Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy in my latest read: 10x is Easier than 2X: How World-Class Entrepreneurs Achieve More by Doing Less

You can suck at doing something but as long as you are committed to sticking it out, you will eventually achieve success. If you believe you are capable and see it through, no matter how long it takes to get there, you will do great things. 

• Episode 36 Transcript

  Because when you quit, game over. If you don't quit, and you offer yourself a pivot when necessary, you're going to reach the success that you desire. And you're going to have to want what you want and be okay with that, and be super brutally honest about, well I want this, why do you want that success?

  Because I do. Like, not that you have to validate it for anybody. This is To The Nines Podcast. I am your host, Tiffany Wicks, a mom of seven who doesn't subscribe to the idea that you have to choose between your family and a career. I am on a mission to show the stay at home mom who has lost herself in child care and cocamelon.

  And the overworked corporate holdout who isn't finding joy and purpose in their career, that they can work for themselves, making an impact in an income that serves your dream life. After leaving my nursing career to raise our family, I needed more mental stimulation, but didn't want to give up the privilege of raising our legacy.

  I've been in network marketing now for five years. I know the strategy and mindset it takes to be successful and to live a life aligned with your values and your purpose. Join me! As I share my business tips, marketing mistakes, attitude shifts, you need to space out some time for you or ditch your nine to five completely and start working for yourself.

  You have the power to change your life. Let's get started. This is just the beginning.

  Hey, welcome back. How are you? What is going on in your world? Is everything? Just coming up aces for ya? Or are you stuck in some sludge? You know, high, high knee in it. Lifting it out. Uh, for me, if you didn't miss us last week, and you didn't even realize that we didn't launch an episode last week, then you didn't miss anything.

  Um, but, if you did notice, We did not launch content last week, um, mostly because I was just completely run down. Um, my assistant Maggie had some stuff going on in her world, and since we're both moms and we both live in what we like to call reality, we also understand like sometimes you just need to call it in and say, you know what, this is, this is just not aligned right now.

  Let's just put this to the side and then when the energy returns and when you feel more competent and capable, um, then let's get back at it. So that's where we're at today. I recorded an episode earlier with a guest that will launch next week, um, which I think will be I mean, it'll be awesome. You guys will love this content, and it is relevant to both men and women.

  Like, I think most of this is relevant to both men and women, despite having a female moi host. All right, so the last episode, let's just rewind it a little bit. I talked about the four D's of doom, and I realized that was a little, like, foreboding, right? Like, oh my gosh, that sounds a little bad. Um, discouragement, delay, doubt, disappointment, distraction.

  Um, Is that five? One, two, three, four. It was five. My bad. Five. Five D's of doom. So now I'm going to talk about the four C's to success. Um, I don't know how this, it's all just coming out of me here. Um, the C's are not my original idea. I am reading a book right now called, and wouldn't it be awesome if I could get this guy on my podcast?

  I'm going to ask him. I mean, what's the worst he's going to do is say no. So, anyway, I am reading a book called 10x is easier than 2x. Meaning, going 10 times the volume of business is easier than doing it 2 times over. And when I first heard a podcast episode with the author of this book, I was like, you're lying.

  Like, I don't even understand the con And he said the concept more than once, and my, you know, little pea brain was still, like, struggling with understanding. No, I, I, I still don't see how that's possible. And you know what, maybe a lot of that is I get stuck with the, uh, the how and not necessarily the what.

  So anyway, they did talk about, and I say they because there's a co author, however, it's like in between chapters he does. what sounds like an interview, um, portion with the other author who is actually the businessman and the author of the book is a psychiatrist or psychologist, one of the two. And at any rate, I'm starting to get the concept a little bit better now.

  And I thought, how relevant would it be After the week of the five D's of doom to bring to you the four C's to 10x success. That's a lot of sis sis happening in my words. So let's just go. So the four of them, I'll just go ahead and say them and then we'll chat through them. Okay? All right, capable, confident, committed, courageous.

  And on the surface, it's like, yeah, okay, great. What does that even mean? Well, first off, whatever endeavor that you choose to partake in or undertake, first off, the key to success in that, and either going 10 times, two times, or even going one time at all, even doing it, you have to believe that you're capable of doing it.

  Like, do you even believe that you can do this? And if the goal is just so wild, you're like, it's a crazy goal. Uh, I'm sure I could, if I knew how, like just stop right there. All you need to start is to feel as though you're capable, like, yeah, I could do that. Now, what if you feel like, no, I, I, I cannot, I cannot do that.

  So if somebody told me, hey, Tiffany, do you think that you could go play in the WNBA? My answer would not be, well, if I practice long and hard and I got a coach. No, my answer would be like, absolutely not. First off, I don't have an interest in it. And second, just physically. I know there's zero chance I would ever make it to the WNBA.

  Like, it just wouldn't happen. So, no, I don't think I'm capable. Well, then we're done here. There's no point in continuing. So, let's go. Capable. Do you believe you're capable? Yes. The capability is there, but you don't yet have the confidence that you can do it, which is the second C, because you haven't yet done it.

  You don't gain confidence by just showing up. You gain confidence through doing something, which means you're going to experience failure. Failure isn't a lack of confidence. Um, failure is just the process you have to go through to get to success. So, you have to believe that you are capable. And then, you have to grow the confidence.

  to do the thing because you have to do the thing in order to get confident in doing the thing. All right. Next thing is because doing the thing requires an awful lot of grown and built in and discovered new confidence and capabilities. You have to be committed to the thing. So for some of you, that thing is just marriage.

  And when I say just marriage, I mean, it's not just marriage. Like that's huge. That should be the biggest, most important relationship of your life. Uh, with people that are here on this earth, that is no small undertaking to be committed to a marriage from the time you say yes. to the time one or both of you die.

  Huge endeavor, but you have to be committed if you're going to see that through, because there are, okay, to be truthful, I, there are zero points in my marriage so far that I thought I want out of this. I'll tell you a funny story about the beginning of my marriage, though, where my husband actually said he wanted out of our marriage, uh, in the first year we were married.

  I know some of you are like, what? All right, just hang on, story time. All right, so the first year we were married, y'all, was really hard, because we had only dated for, Uh, in the same area for three months. Okay, so I was in, um, Valdosta, Georgia, and he was in Panama City, Florida. He was learning to fly the, uh, F 15 fighter aircraft with the United States Air Force at the time, and I was going to college and working in, uh, Valdosta, Georgia.

  So we were long distance. When we met, we had only dated in the same town for like three weeks, and then he went to Florida, and then I stayed in Georgia. Well, Once we were dating for like three months, I found out that I had to deploy because I was also in the Air Force Reserves at the time. So I had to deploy in December and it was like August and we had just met three and a half weeks prior.

  So I was like, well now what? Well, this is not relevant to the podcast episode, but I knew Adam was my guy from the minute I laid eyes on him. Like true. It sounds so cheesy. I get it. And some of you guys are like gag me with a freaking spoon I'm gonna puke all over if she goes on to this sappy love stuff, but no lie I knew that he was my guy the minute I laid eyes on him and I was like, that's him.

  That's my husband I I have to have him so when I went up to him and introduced myself Um, I was very forward and it was very matter of fact that one way or another we were going to be together. So, when I found out I had to deploy after dating this guy for just a few months and most of it being long distance, um, it was not beyond me to say exactly what I said.

  I said, look man, I am not deploying here with just a boyfriend. I am either leaving with a fiance or I'm leaving single. The ball's now in your court. Well, you know, he had had a very limited dating experience because his focus had truly been on excelling in his aviation career. So he was not thinking at all about marriage at that point.

  Like, he really liked me. He thought I was great looking. We had a lot of fun together. And, you know, he knew that we were a great fit. But marriage? That was not on boy's radar. Okay? He was not thinking that until I just threw that. So, So, the first question, you know, that he asked was, you know, if I would marry him over the phone, and I said no, and I actually screamed an expletive at him because I thought, you know, how, how rude to just throw it out there so nonchalantly over the phone.

  So I hung up on him and then we were in a fight. So the next time he asked me to marry him was a few days later at the beach, except he didn't have a ring. So it didn't feel truly legit. I did say yes, but I was like, okay, well, and then a couple of days later we're sitting out by the pool and I'm like, this doesn't really feel real.

  And he's like, no, it doesn't. All right. So he, we go to the jewelry store. I pick out three rings that I really like and then I leave. He picks out out of the three, which one he likes the best. A few days later, he puts a rushed delivery on this ring, proposes for a third time, and this time, he has the ring, he has the intention, he's on his knees, and I happily said yes.

  Here we are, 18 years later, still glad I said yes. Moving on. Okay, so that goes with committed. So, that was our first, like, few months whirlwind, right? So, I deploy in December, and I am gone for almost an entire year, and we're Planning our wedding while I am in the desert and he is flying different aircraft.

  He gets stationed up in Alaska We're trying to plan a wedding. We're trying to figure out still learn each other long distance. We're on opposite sides of the world I'm in a war zone He's over here during you know peacetime in the US and We're trying to plan a wedding with two people that have been around each other for about three weeks and only dated for about three months sounds Completely idiotic when you say it out loud But that is our story However Our first year was really tough.

  We moved in together right after we were married, so we had never lived together. We had hardly even been together, and now suddenly we're married and having to share a life together. Well, he wasn't used to having to talk to me about where he was going, uh, what he was up to, how much money he was spending, and I wasn't used to, you know, having a real man.

  I'd only been dating little boys up to that point who were irresponsible. They were cheaters. They were liars. So I took my previous baggage, if you will, and brought that into my brand new marriage and then treated him as if he were a criminal when he had done nothing wrong. Um, but he also wasn't being accountable to me because he had practiced so much personal independence that now having a wife.

  He felt like he didn't understand like why he had to not necessarily answer to me. But like, we just didn't understand how we were going to be teammates in this life. Like we just didn't get it. We just needed to work through it. So the first year he was like, that's it. I suck at this marriage thing. Just take everything.

  I'm like, take everything. We have nothing. You're a broke Lieutenant. I'm working at a restaurant just coming out of the air force reserves. And I'm a brand new nurse. We got nothing. What do you mean, take everything? And he was like, I suck at this. I can't be a good husband. And I'm like, look, I suck as a wife, so why don't we just suck at this together for as long as it takes to finally get good at it?

  So that's where the commitment comes in. Yeah, we really sucked at being married early on. We had no idea what we were doing. We were committed to the process of figuring it out, and we were committed to each other. And we said, all right. We suck at this right now, but we're committed to figuring it out and figuring it out We did and we do not suck anymore at being married.

  I think we are awesome at being married I think we're great teammates and he is still hands down the love of my life. So moving on So if you are in a business endeavor You also need to be committed to sucking in the beginning and then seeing it through because the only way you truly fail is to quit You hear that?

  I'm going to repeat it for emphasis. The only way you fail is if you quit. You have to keep moving, and you have to be committed to the process. All right, and the last C in that list to 10x success is courageous, um, and not courageous in the sense of, you know, our Marines running into, you know, building with bullets flying because that's some pretty damn courageous stuff right there.

  But courageous. in the endeavors of risking it all if you will risking your Integrities risking your um your social status risking your family sometimes not your wife and your kids But sometimes if your wife's on board and you guys are going to empty a bank account Like you're putting it all on the line and she's trusting you or he's trusting you that this is going to pan out.

  And uh, that takes a lot of courage. And I commend entrepreneurs who have nothing and started from nothing, who were just scrappy as hell. Made it happen in the end. I mean, those are the stories I love most. Those underdog stories where you weren't willed an entire business that you were able to grow and expand, that you were so scrappy, so determined.

  You were just un, untethered when it came to how you were going to reach your success. I mean, the how was not even so important as much as the fact that it was inevitable for you. That level of inevitability, this is going to happen. I don't have the how, I don't have the when, but I know the what. So I'm going to keep moving forward with that.

  If you dig in to those four C's, you can 10X your entire life. Okay, you have to understand and believe truly that you're capable of achieving it. You have to practice confidence through failure, which means you have to do the damn thing. You really, you're going to have to get in there and do it. You're going to have to fail forward.

  You have to be committed to the process, no matter how long it takes. Because when you quit, game over. If you don't quit and you offer yourself a pivot when necessary, you're going to reach the success that you desire. And you're gonna have to want what you want and be okay with that and be super brutally honest about, well, I want this.

  Why do you want that success? Because I do. Like, not that you have to validate it for anybody, not that you have to have a really good reason. You don't have to. You want it because you want it, and that has to be enough. You have to be committed, and you have to be courageous enough to stand up to other people when they're, Why?

  Why? Okay, that was, and I'll tell you another personal story. My, um, my mother in law used to ask me, Why isn't being a mom enough for you? Why do you have to do this other stuff? And I said, Because I want to. And then she just, like, That because you want to yeah, because I want to and because I want to ought to be enough Because I am NOT just somebody's mother.

  I am NOT just somebody's wife. I am NOT just their friend I am also me Tiffany Lynn Wicks I am an independent person who has my own thoughts my own opinions I am my own human being outside of all these other people that I am in relationship and community with I am still my own person, and I want it because I want it, and that's it.

  I don't have to validate it any further. It's because I do. That's what I want. Now, she never understood it. She never appreciated it. Still doesn't. Don't care. Moving on. And, you know what? I'm having a great time over here. I love recording these podcast episodes. I love continuing to learn. And there's definitely more content coming to you from that book.

  If you haven't picked it up yet, it will certainly be worth your time. I'm gonna throw the invite out there, alright? I'm gonna see if, uh Author of 10x is easier than 2x is Dan Sullivan with Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Alright, fantastic book. I'm going to throw it out there. I'm going to see if we can get him on the podcast, y'all.

  What do you think? Go ahead and hit me up on Instagram. Let me know. Um, what else do you guys want to hear about? I love to talk about the things that interest you. Um, if you DM me some questions that don't really fit in a podcast format, I'll answer them on a live. I did that today. So, um, today is Not the day you're listening to this podcast, but today's the 25th then go back listen to my lives.

  All right, my friends That is what I have for you this week I am so glad that you decided to tune in and as always if you love what you're listening to Please go to the ratings right now. Stop this go to the ratings Give me a five star rating. Leave me a great comment. If you don't love it, that's fine You don't have to rate it, but do share the show.

  I mean, I don't advertise on here. I don't take advertisers I am putting out content To help make a better life for you and to see how I can serve you better. So share the show, tag somebody, give me a rating and review, five stars, and uh, I will catch you on next week's episode. Ciao friends!